Happy Beyond Belief - Adoption Day!

Wow, so much has happened in the last 2 days,and I'm dead tired, and Joaquin wakes up in 30 minutes so this might be a little disjointed.

First off, Joaquin is amazing, here's some more adjectives: curious, perceptive, funny, has a great sense of humor, he is deliberate in his play (45 minutes last night taking crayons in and out of the box carefully and with great attention - reminds me of Eric). He is generous and observant and adapted amazingly well to his first day out of the orphanage, clearly so much of his surroundings were brand new. The boy is potty trained! I sat him on a western toilet, which he clearly had never seen in his life, asked him to pee pee and he did it!! This a.m. his first bowel movement, once again right in the toilet. Thanks be to God. He hasn't skipped a beat. Flushing the toilet scared the living daylights out of him the first time, and the next time he needed to push the flusher himself. His fine motor skills are excellent, loves to turn lights off/on, play with the TV buttons though I get the impression he hasn't watched TV before, more interested in the buttons than the screen. He loves taking a bath, just laughed out loud when we were pouring water over each other, including when I washed his hair. He wanted to get in the tub first thing this a.m. He did alot of self-soothing behaviors the first day, and was clearly dissociating off and on, but he also started to attach to me sooner than I predicted. He loves touch and started soothing himself by running his fingers over my blouse again and again, about a half hour after we met. He likes to be cheek to cheek, and he likes to have one arm around my neck and play with my hair. Last night we were both restless all night long, but he would reach out for me over and over to touch my arm or hand, both in his sleep and when he was awake.

He and I are most definitely attaching. It sounds really cliche but it literally felt like lightning struck when he walked into the room the first time we met. This was yesterday a.m., at the equivalent of City Hall in Taiyuan. Just two families meeting our kids that day, which I am grateful for. It wasn't chaotic, the other family met their daughter first about a half hour before Joaquin arrived. This family is adopting their 3rd child, so I'm learning a lot about what to expect from them. Anyway, he walked into the room, was immediately distressed, and little by little I worked my way over to him. He liked the magna-doodle and knew how to hold the pen; he prefers his left hand, just like mom, who knew? In China you're considered less intelligent if you're left-handed. He cried quite a bit the first hour, yet also let me hold him within that time, clutched my hand, etc. By the end of the day he was seeking me out across the hotel room and following me around.

He is tiny! At first we all thought he couldn't be older than 2 1/2, I still really question it, size 2T is big on him. The more we interact he acts closer to 3, especially his attention span, he is just so little, likely malnutrition. They have been feeding him powedered milk formula until yesterday, but said he started eating solids recently. I kid you not! Since yesterday, he is eating like a horse, he refuses nothing and is so vigilant about where the food is coming from. He lets me feed him and waits patiently but again, he has a purpose. He eats every single thing I offer, and I know a lot of it is new. The good thing is we have excellent Western/Eastern buffet breakfasts, and they serve rice porridge and oatmeal porridge and the kind of dumplings that are common in the north, so he continues to eat the food he has been most exposed to. We are going to weigh him today so we have a sense of how much weight he gains, I think he is going to take off.

He is just a cutey patootey, the first 24 hours are basically a trial period, called "Harmony Period" before custody is formally granted. I can truly say it has been a harmony period. He eats, plays, interacts socially, pees and poops, and sleeps, all beyond my expectations. He is a trooper. He is going to adapt just fine, he discriminates already between me and everybody else. Sarah, bless her heart, is so smitten with him and has been so gracious to step back and let him attach to me; she is 3 steps ahead of me in facilitating our every move. He likes to flirt with her and make sure she is with us. Sarah has also been able to observe in a way that I can't when I'm in the middle of formal meetings, especially this a.m. We had to go back to City Hall for the formal adoption. It was stressful - more paperwork, money paid, gift exchanges for officials, the orphanage staff came back and the energy in the room was tense. Joaquin was fussy and didn't like being back there one bit. Sarah noticed he was not pleased to be around the orphanage staff again. Sarah helped immeasurably, and also commented that Joaquin was watching my every move and responded to my laugh from across the room. I like it. Just now when I put him down for a nap he was fussy, then turned to look at me, really held my gaze for the longest time yet, and he calmed. We are already reaching some of the attachment milestones that sometimes take weeks and months and I am grateful grateful grateful.

I am amazed how well he is doing. I have no concerns whatsoever about his mental and emotional development, somebody clearly cared for him because he loves to be held and he connects socially. Physically, he obviously has some catching up to do. He has spent a lot of time in a walker, you can tell because when he wants to turn directions he walks side to side, like you have to do in a walker. Yesterday he also walked like a cowboy, though today he's walking more naturally. He loves to walk. The latest new thing today was taking the escalator, he was in awe of it and loved it. He responds well to my Chinese, which I'm also thankful for because I'm not certain how much of my intonation I've lost and also he very well could have been taught a different dialect than what I speak, so this is good. Oh, he also started learning sign language yesterday, he learned please pretty quick because he knew it would get him food and that's his goal in life right now!

I'm glad this a.m. is over, after today we do have a medical exam as well as a consulate appt. when we fly to Guangzhou but they tell me it is nothing like this a.m. I am beyond tired, my internal clock wakes at 1:30 a.m. and I haven't been able to get back to sleep after that. Also, the anticipation of meeting Joaquin, and then the emotional relief of being just so grateful that he is healthy and also amazed at what an amazing person he is, have been intense to say the least. Oh, the cleft palate! His lip repair looks a bit sloppy if you asked me, and I've seen glimpses of the cleft palate when he lets me. I have nothing to judge it by, but it looks big. He has no trouble eating, he can't do the sippy cup or straw because of the sucking motion needed, but he drinks straight from a cup and is getting much better at it since yesterday. They told me they were feeding him liquids with a spoon?!

I know this is really disjointed, will write more later. We have taken many pictures and have to purchase a converter to upload them to the computer here, look for this within the next 24 hrs.

You all are going to love him, he is such a pleasure, he has quite the little personality and loves to learn. He is definitely adaptable, takes risks, finds amusement easily. We already are developing little jokes between us, he definitely likes to play to an audience.

So in conclusion I am overwhelmed with gratefulness and I'm savoring every moment getting to know him. Continue to send good wishes and thoughts and energy, after today I do believe we will begin settling in, and rest will come. 3 more days in Taiyuan, then we fly to Guangzhou. We're basically just waiting for his passport to be processed at this point. Then in Guangzhou 6 more days. I said to Sarah, the way things are going we may be able to actually focus on enjoying seeing more of China. It's as new to Joaquin as it is to us. He is fascinated and also easilty overstimulated, as are we, so we're going to take it easy the next couple of days, go play in the park, eat, rest, poop, the usual.

More soon! Love to you all - Karen & Joaquin